In these days of social media, we are privy to a record of past bad days, boring Wednesdays, frustrating evenings, and possibly things we would rather forget. I was reminded of this just yesterday when on my Facebook, a notification from "Memories" popped up. The memory was a post, "an end of year recap" of 2017. 2017 would be remembered mostly because of a tragedy at the end of the year. It would be defined by this. But guess what? It wasn't! The year itself was filled with many exciting things. Apparently, on December 31, 2017, I recognized that, but through 2018 and 2019, I changed. The hardships of one event engulfed me in such a way that I have been unable to grasp the not so hard moments and even the glorious ones since then. How did this happen? How did this happen to me?
(Keep an eye on the first word of that last question, I did not write "why," I wrote, "how." Why things happen is up in the air. We do not know "why" some people who smoke get lung cancer, and others don't. We will never know "why" bad things happen to good people and vice versa. However, "how," how we react to all these things, THAT is our decision and under our control.)
I have been a pretty positive person throughout my life. I would say I am indeed a "glass is half full" type if I wanted to use that cliche. I enjoy picking out the very best in the worst of people and helping them to achieve their best selves. I'm a dreamer, a hope finder, a get things doner, (is that a word?) well, you know what I mean. And somehow, I allowed all the wrong moments starting from the end of 2017 to pile up and mask anything beautiful going on.
There were lots of wrong moments in 2018. It seems that each of them spiraled and kept fueling the tornado that may have started in 2017, or I just allowed them to live in my head and block anything good. The fact remains that everything that has gone wrong could have been even worse! How is it that I didn't remind myself of that? How is it that the most significant part of who I truly am was snuffed out? I was tired.
That's it in a nutshell. I was tired. It is work to stay positive. It is harder to see the silver lining. For some, it is more comfortable to sit in negativity, to accept "this is as good as it gets" than to change your mindset and focus on what are the good parts. The work of staying positive is overwhelming. I was tired, and I allowed terrible things happening around me and the negativity of those around me to latch on. I absorbed it and began only focusing on that side of the fence, so to speak. Then I saw the post. I saw all the extraordinary things that had happened during a year that all I seemed to recall were the tragedies.
So here I sit thinking, "hindsight IS 20/20," and we have started not just a new year but a new decade. It is 2020! It's going to be work. It is going to be hard. We are going to be tired. Let's take naps and revitalize. Let's cheer one another on. Let's remember pleasant moments and build on them. Let's create a 2020 that when we look back on it, the cliche of hindsight is irrelevant because we chose an outlook to focus on the marvelous moments.
